Win One For The Jipper

On October 22, 2003 West Virginia played #3 in the nation Virginia Tech in college football. It was a huge upset and went down in history as the highest ranked team West Virginia had ever beat. There is a trick play used sparingly in college football, rarely in the NFL, called the Statue of Liberty. As the Quarterback drops back to pass he holds the ball high above his shoulder, in a cocked position. Just before he throws, a wide receiver or running back will take the ball from his hand and run with it or throw it down field. West Virginia beat Virginia Tech 28 to 7. VT turned the ball over a number of times on interceptions and fumbles and the one touchdown they managed to score came after a controversial fumble/tackle call. West Virginia celebrated as is customary by tearing down the field goal post.

11 states had a gay marriage initiative included on their Presidential ballot Tuesday. Arkansas, Georgia, Kentucky, Mississippi, Montana, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Ohio, and Utah voted and all ended up turning red on the scoreboards I watched light up Nov. 2. Oregon and Michigan sadly, were the only scores we could put up. Exit polling in Ohio showed that people voted on moral issues above all other things.

I kept hearing this on the radio and on television and it didn't make sense to me. I asked myself how, with an unjust war claiming "collateral damage" and "soft targets" (Iraqi and American lives), a shitty economy, an attack that took place, mind you under this great protector's watch, how is it that people keep saying they voted on moral issues? Further more how does a vote for moral issues equal a vote for Mr. BU**SH**?

So I threw in my red flag. I was gonna challenge this call. Why did only eleven states vote on Gay Marriage? This guy, Rove: he's ephing brilliant. These people in Ohio got off of their ass to make sure gays could not marry. They polled this crap, they knew what pissed people off, they knew Ohio was overwhelmingly against gay marriage and they knew, most importantly, how to push the issue. This issue that does not even affect the voters lives in a direct way like, for instance health care for children would. It was more important to them that no homosexual in Ohio have equal rights, than it was for their children to have health care. 230,000 jobs lost, yes that sucks, but them gays, we gotta stop them gays.

I suppose when the winning team is so good at winning, when they win in ways I could have never imagined, when they use trick plays so creative and so sound, it doesn't hurt as bad. The BU**SH** administration has a tall task ahead of them. They have four years of running to do. Four years for some of these things I've been reading about to catch up with them. Four years for the people who voted for Bush to realize what they've done.

It makes me happy that this creatively devious trick play in football is named the Statue of Liberty. West Virginia ran the Statue of Liberty play against Virginia Tech successfully not once, not twice, but THREE TIMES! Makes you wonder when they'll learn.

UPDATE: Composing thoughts about the election with an undeniable sensitivity to poetry and prose, Jared has returned.