Picture A or...(see post below)

jona-no-burns
Originally uploaded by Cap'n Pete.

Picture B

jona-burns
Originally uploaded by Cap'n Pete.

Odyssey Sucks!

I got beef with some of you. Well, indirectly.

I am an avid NPR listener. I wake up with Morning Edition which I usually only catch the end of. Then World Cafe, which is the only radio program I've ever heard play a Tom Waits song. After that it's Democracy Now, with Amy Goodman, which is always fantastic. After a while Odyssey from Chicago Public Radio comes on. This is where all of you Mid-westerners come in.

I've been telling people to tune in to this show just to hear how dumb it is (maybe I should spell it dum). A recent topic was the Road and our relationship to it. They actually have scholars who come on this show and discuss the road. But even the scholars seem dum-founded when they realize what they've been duped into. The guests are always saying to the moderator, "Umm, I'm not really sure what you’re getting at." I think the show seems worse because Talk of the Nation is on right after it and the king of all moderators, Neal Conan, hosts it. Yes, the moderator sucks but the topics...I can hardly blame the poor girl. What I should do is take whatever tomorrows question is and post it at the formerly alive University Without Condition. I think a better conversation could ensue there. Anyway, I'm just surprised. It seemed like you Midwest bloggers had some good things happening out there, which I'm sure you do, but this Odyssey thing needs to be stopped. I'm wondering if you're forced to listen to it out there.

H-ell-TML

I just realized that 90% of the people who come to Coney Island to visit Cap'n Pete can't see anything but a green wall with some links to the side of it. I loved my blog when viewed in Safari. There is a Cy Twombly painting in the background of my title and some drawing I found on a Google image search behind my posts and it all just looked so cool. Then I viewed it through Internet Explorer. What a "catastrophic success!" It looks like crap. Lines everywhere and side bars floating anywhere but left. Does any one know how to have an image in the background through internet explore. The
background: url('image goes in here') tag just doesn't work in Explorer.
Plus I have to switch to tables because my sidebar and main column won't line up flush. I can only imagine what this train wreck looks like on a PC. It really sucks because I just learned a whole bunch of crap on Photoshop 7 that I can implement perfectly through Safari which about 3% of the blog population uses. I will continue to whistle the solo whistle from Patience until I figure this out. I don't want to start all over...

And Now, The Conclusion of "Poopert, It's Worth It"

He emerged from the bathroom and fear struck. He shouted to my brother-in-law and myself, "Oh my God! Did you guys see this note that Emily left for me?" He bought it hook, line and sinker. He was overwhelmed. "Can you imagine the audacity of this woman, telling me not to poop here, poop at home. Look! Look at the note. It was on the toilet and it was addressed to me. Apparently it's ok for you two to poop here but not me." He was pacing back and forth in a rage that had been building up for weeks.

I suppose I should just tell him to calm down. I should tell him the note is a forgery.

Emily is expected home in a matter of hours. My plan is to find the forged note and destroy it (and wait to hear Poopert scream after a blast of cold water from the kitchen sink). When the two confront each other, they'll both think the other is completely insane and we'll get to just watch. Unfortunately, Poopert has taken the note for his wife to see. Hours go by. Emily arrives.

Emily asks Robert what he has accomplished today. He begins his usual rant of heartfelt excuses. "Well I couldn't finish the counters without the finishing nails I told you I needed, and the electrician still needs to route off these wires, plus you only gave me five hours and I didn't want to start outside if I couldn't finish it but I did clean up in here..." and on and on. She says, "so what did you do?" He says, "just give me my check, I'm out of here and I'm not coming back." And then, like a Meatloaf bat out of hell, Emily says,

"You know Robert, that note you left me in the bathroom yesterday was unnecessary. We're not children anymore and I would think you could understand how to use a toilet"
Bewildered, Poopert replies,"THE NOTE I LEFT YOU WAS UNNECESSARY!! THE NOTE I LEFT YOU!!?? THE NOTE YOU LEFT ME WAS COMPLETELY UNCALLED FOR!! Just write me the check I'm out of here.

*Note- Poopert does not say the note you left me today, nor does he produce the note. He simply says the note you left me. Emily, of course is thinking of the note she left yesterday. She has no idea that she has also left a note today.

My brother-in-law and myself can hardly breathe. We are in an adjoining room, nervous that the secret will be revealed but laughing to hard to do or say anything nor are we in any position to make any coherent judgements. I have recreated the scene so that you can understand our proximity to the poop showdown.


Poopert ended up leaving absolutley bewildered by the day. The electricians played a joke on him and this crazy lady orders him to "poop at Home!" At lest the painters understand what I've been going through. He shook my hand on the way out. I asked him if he had my number, which he did, and he said he would give me a call about another job he may need some help with. The prank was masterful. I will be sure to keep you updated should we end up working with the now famous Poopert.

When viewing this page, is there an image behind the post and an image behind the title` (Take Me To Coney Island at the top of the page) or is it just solid colors? Any feedback would be helpful. Thanks.